Jessica's Mumbo Jumbo

Take a glimpse into the world of an inattentive, oversensitive,hyperactive,& unorganized 33 year old mother with Attention Deficit Disorder!

The Struggle is Real: ADD & Motherhood DO NOT MIX!

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It’s been quite some time since I’ve posted for my blog and I have a very good reason, I promise you! My very last post was approximately written about 3 years ago, yes, I know unacceptable. But please, I beg of you, there is a valid excuse. I became a mom!  In addition to that I have ADD and to throw another responsibility into the mix, I teach Special Education at the high school level. I know, I know, I’m not the only mom out there who has to juggle a multitude of tasks, but to be honest, it’s fucking hard, time-consuming and stressful as hell and I have the utmost respect for those moms who have their shit together. I would give my left leg to have my shit together.

I’m sure many of you non-super-Pinterest-moms out there most likely cannot relate because you are simply amazing, but at least I know that there are other ADD moms out there who can. I’m really going to focus on maintaining my blog because I really need some ” me time.” I honestly don’t care if that sounds the least bit selfish because as a mom, you need that time. My “me”time usually consists of spending time in the bathroom until my three year old, Emma,  begins banging on the door while screaming          “DON’T LEAVE ME MOMMY!” On the top of her fucking lungs! Like seriously I can’t get a moment to breathe. Where the hell does she think I’m going to go? I’m in the bathroom that’s less than a foot away from your room!

I know being a mom with ADD can be super stressful sometimes, (O.K.–most of the time!) but to be quite frank, I would not change it for the world. I love being a mom and the craziness that comes along with the job keeps me on my toes. My daughter is the best thing that has ever happened to me!

Here is a list of my top ten struggles that I face as an ADD mom!!! I hope many of you can relate!

1.I tend to lose a lot of things! There have been MANY instances when I was supposed to fill out a form for Emma’s daycare and I lost the paper–not once, but a few times! Lets just say that I lose my cell, debit card, keys and anything that is considered important on a daily basis. This is an extremely touchy subject for me because losing things causes so much stress in mine and Emma’s life.

2.I am very forgetful! I might forget to bring something to a party at Emma’s school. Sorry kids, I know I signed up to bring in the juice boxes and plates, looks like you will be drinking tap water and eating caveman style! #bannedfromclassparties.  I tend to forget to sign her in and out on the computer at her school in the mornings. I can’t tell you how many times the owner reminds me how this is a safety issue in addition to his way of tracking whether or not I pick her up later than I am supposed to so that he can charge me an additional 5 dollars. I am living off a teacher’s salary for christ’s sake, can’t you cut me a damn break? Those 5 dollars add up quickly. Oh, and filling my gas tank? That is another nightmare. I found myself stranded in the middle of a major highway most recently because I forgot to fill my gas tank!

3.  Did I mention forgetfulness? Don’t get me started. This causes me to be late for EVERYTHING.I lose my keys, forget to grab Emma’s lunchbox or backpack on our way to school in the morning. I have caused us to be locked out of the house for hours. Then when I go to get the spare key that is hidden outside (which my husband hid purposely to prevent this), I suddenly remember that I forgot to put it back in the hiding spot! I forget to pack certain things that Emma may need for school (show and tell items, bathing suit, etc.). Thank god my daughter has a much better memory that I do, she is always there to remind me! “Listen Em, during show and tell, just show everyone your imaginary toy. Then when they say that they cannot see it, tell them they’re nuts). LOL

4.I tend to let her down sometimes. I  forget making promises or plans with her. I am lucky to have such an understanding three-year-old who has developed empathy for my disability.

5.My disorganization and messiness is rubbing off on my daughter and I fear this will continue as she grows up. I have gotten much better over the years because I have learned to stay on top of my piles. I started to put things away throughout the day. However, Emma does not understand the concept of putting her toys away when she is done playing with them nor does she understand the concept of  keeping her room clean. It looks like an explosion went off in her bedroom. There are piles everywhere. Can you say recipe for disaster?

6.Sometimes, I am easily agitated (especially if I forgot to fill my prescription) and when I feel that way, I tend to ignore her or get mad at the smallest things. Especially when she hangs all over me or asks me for something a million times. I fucking LOSE IT!

 7.I tend to lose interest at times when I am engaged in an activity with Emma. This causes her to feel like I am not interested in spending time with her. “Ok, mommy will color with you for a minute.” (one minute into coloring)….. “How about a puzzle now? I have to go do laundry. Sorry kid, looks like you’re on your own.”

8.She really wants a brother or sister, and although I would love to provide her with that, I know I won’t be able to handle the responsibility of having two children. “Sorry Em, it looks like you will have to rely on your cousins for companionship.” Thanks ADD!!

9.Food shopping & cooking!!! I am having some serious anxiety just thinking about this! I could write an entire post solely on the hatred I feel towards food shopping and cooking. THANK GOD my husband is the complete opposite and is like Gordon Ramsay in the kitchen. #lovemyironchef  I fucking hate food shopping and cooking. I just vomitted a little bit in my mouth thinking about it. My heart is literally pounding as a I write this post. When my husband tells me to go food shopping (after we have literally eaten everything in the house), I grit my teeth, nod and smile forcefully. As soon as I enter the grocery store, I am overcome with an instant feeling of panic and confusion. Feelings of anger consume my mind and I shoot nasty texts to my husband. “Why are you making me do this? Is this some sort of punishment?” He has learned to ignore those texts because it is my way of coping. Since I have no system or sense of organization, I just start tossing shit in the cart. When I go to checkout, and the cashier asks for coupons… my answer is always the same “yea.. uhmmmm, I really have to start using those.. if I could only get my shit together”then the cashier asks if I have my savings card… I realize that I lost that a long time ago so I plug in my old cell phone number to retrieve it… because I was too lazy to update the account. And cooking? Do not get me started… Lets just say, it is an absolute nightmare.

10.The one thing that really SUCKS about being a mom and teacher with ADD is getting myself and a toddler ready in the morning, oh, and FORGETFULNESS. Can we say fucking nightmare? My morning consists of hitting the snooze button a thousand times (literally) and rushing around the house like a madman. Dressing my daughter when she is half asleep and having to run to Wawa to buy Emma’s lunch because, well, I didn’t stay on top of the food shopping. On my way out, I realize I forgot Emma’s backpack and run in to get it only to realize I removed my key off my key ring the other day so that I could allow my car to run while I just ran in for something else I forgot. I then go to grab the spare that my husband hid only to find that I forgot to put that back. Sorry Em, looks like you won’t have your blanket or spare clothes today…. make sure you don’t crap your pants and maybe wearing your winter coat is a nice replacement for your blanket during nap-time.

And so here you have it! Just a list that I hope many of you can relate to so that you know you are not alone and that the #struggleisreal

Never forget: You are wonderful and you are doing an amazing job!!!

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“You’re (not) Glowing!”

If I received a dollar for each and every time someone said to me “You’re glowing!” I would be friggin’ rich. Every time someone tells me that I am glowing, I reach for my mirror in a desperate attempt to try to see what it is exactly that the other person is seeing. After taking a quick glance of my pregnant face, I think to myself, “How the HELL am I glowing?” I mean really…… I have acne, a double chin, a chubby face, and a fat ass. Sometimes I think people just say that because they think it is what should be said to all pregnant women. My step mother even got me a shirt that says “You glow girl!” for christ’s sake. And do you think I am actually out there proudly sportin’ that shirt? HELL NO. I sure as hell do not want to attract any more attention to myself than I already receive. When I am out in public, people are constantly gawking at me like I have three heads, like they have never seen a pregnant woman before…. No this is not a beer gut. 

Trust me, I am ecstatic and feel blessed that I am pregnant, and I am by no means trying to be cynical… but I just do not see this “glow” that people supposedly see when they look at me…I mean, come on. really…. how the HELL am I glowing?? Is it the extra oil on my face that my pregnant body keeps producing?  I have gained 50 lbs already, my boobs are triple the size they once were, my face has completely filled in, I sweat like a horse, I am always out of breath, I get acne like a hormonal teenager, and my pants are bursting at the seems..lol. I think it is really sweet that people compliment me, but I really wish I could see this so called “glow” that they see because I sure as hell do not see it! lol.  

My Real Excuse for Lack of Blog Posts….

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I apologize to all of my followers for my lack of blog posts, but so much has been going on in my life that posting has been the least that has been on my mind. It is crazy how much your life can change so drastically in the matter of a few months! But what is my real excuse for my lack of blog posts you ask?

Well, as I have previously shared with you on here a few months ago… I was diagnosed with Bipolar and ADD about 5 years ago, and was on medication during that time frame. (Yea, yea, I am crazy and proud of it!) After I lost my job and was beyond depressed (which I did not think was possible since I was on damn antidepressants!), I found out I am pregnant! Yup, that is right! As of right now, I am 19 weeks pregnant and am due at the end of April! Back in August, I was feeling nauseous and tired as hell and I just figured it was because of my depression. That was until I took a pregnancy test and it came out positive! The next day I stopped taking all of my meds cold turkey!!! I know that is dangerous to do, but there is no way I was going to be taking Lamictal, Vyvanse and Lexapro while pregnant! I would be a horrible mother if I fed that to my fetus!! lol. I made the decision that it is more important to have a healthy baby born birth defect free rather than give birth to a baby who is dependent on psychiotic drugs with birth defects. That would absolutely kill me inside!  I have decided that I am strong enough to fight my depression for 9 months for the sake of the baby’s health.

I am not going to lie though.. Not being on my medication has changed my life drastically. Not only does my body have to fight having a mental illness and adjust being med. free… It also has to adjust to the rollercoaster ride of emotions and the crazy change in hormones that coincide with pregnancy. Talk about a freaking nightmare.

As you can see, it has been about 5 months since I have actually posted, and this is because my days pretty much have consisted of sleeping, eating and crying. When you are not on medication when your brain really needs it, it is definitely tough. Medication makes me normal. It also gives me my life back, When I was on my medication, I looked forward to blogging, knitting, photography and creating jewelry. However, when you are a bipolar pregnant woman, you could really care less about anything. The only thing I really cared about was taking care of my growing baby inside me which I truly feel is a gift from god. You know what? I truly feel that god gives us the gift of a child when we truly need it. I have seen this happen so many times to a number of people in my life. It took my husband and I one year until we got pregnant, and it could not have been at a better time.

After losing a job that I loved, I was fighting depression, and knowing that I have something to live for truly gives me a reason to wake up everyday.This baby gives me a reason to live, to take care of myself and to keep looking forward.  I thank god everyday for this blessing.

I only have about four more months left until I can truly feel like myself again, and I am proud of how far I have come. Having a mental illness is definitely a daily struggle, and I have to fight it in order to have a normal day. I never realized that until I saw the sadness in my husband’s eyes when he desperately said to me ” I miss Jess. I miss your smile, your laugh and your happiness.” “I am proud of you for fighting your bipolar and ADD without your medicine, but it has been so tough.” He even made a good point. He said “You cannot stop living your life. You used to laugh so much and smile. You used to enjoy posting on your blog!” He continued, “You are stronger than this! You cannot just sleep all of the time and do nothing. Whether you like it or not, you are a mother right now.” 

I looked down at my stomach and it had not clicked in my mind before that moment. He was right. Although the baby is not physically in my arms just yet, I became a mother the moment I conceived and what kind of mother just wastes their days feeling sorry for themselves? I made a promise right then and there that I would fight harder for my husband and our baby.

And so, here I am feeling better after our chat and finally accomplishing a task that I would have normally done when I was feeling like myself. Although I still have a few more months to go before I am myself again, I think the more I fight my illness, keep a normal routine, and do the things I once loved, I will be able to find happiness again without having to rely on medication to alter the chemicals in my brain. Well, there you have it. Prior to this post, my real excuse for my lack of blog posts is all because I have been fighting my depression and Bipolar, but obviously not hard enough. I think this blog post truly shows my commitment to fighting this illness on my own while I attempt to become normal again and gain my life back.

 

Beautiful Butterflies <3

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I took these butterfly pics at Deep Cut Gardens, a park in NJ, with my telephoto lens on my Canon T1i. Aren’t they beautiful and photogenic?

Rose Photos!

I took pics of this rose at Deep Cut Gardens, a park in NJ, with my Canon T1i Rebel. I thought the colors were so pretty!

Oh, Inspiration! I miss you so!

I know that it has been quite a while since I last posted on my blog, and this is highly unlike me, but, unfortunately, I have not felt inspired since I lost my job. I know, it is pathetic of me. And I know what you are thinking…. “Come on Jess! Just move on and get over it already!” “I am sick of reading your depressing posts.” LOL… But… I just want to see if anyone can relate to what it is that I am currently feeling. If you find that you can relate, then maybe you can help me to learn how to feel inspired again.

If there is one thing that I learned from losing something that I loved (that being my job), is that when you love something, it inspires you to do things that you never thought that you had the capability of doing. This may sound a little corny, and I know I have always associated feeling inspiration with human relationships, but I never thought a job would inspire me. ever. Not in a trillion years.

I have always been a “workaholic” my whole life and have held many jobs. Out of all of the jobs that I have had in the past, I never once felt an ounce of inspiration, happiness or contentment. That was of course true, until I became a teacher. With this new found happiness and contentment came new found inspiration. Nothing, and I mean NOTHING has ever made me feel inspired until I became a teacher. Screw the ADD medicine that I have taken my whole life to help me with motivation. My teaching job was my drug and it truly inspired me.

I loved being a teacher and actually looked forward to coming to work each and everyday. It did not feel like a job when I was in the classroom teaching. I knew that I was contributing to society and making the world a better place. With that being said, I felt content when I left work everyday and went home. I thought to myself, “Wow, I finally found my calling and am changing students’ lives.”
I thought to myself THIS IS WHAT I WORKED SO HARD TO ACHIEVE. TO MAKE OTHERS’ LIVES BETTER. TO TEACH. INSPIRE. I can finally be happy.

Being a teacher inspired me in so many ways. When you work with teenagers, you learn to appreciate life more. I was inspired to love my life all over again, and to remember what it is like to be young again. I loved seeing my students’ succeed, and achieve accomplishments. I loved providing them with a safe place to go to everyday. I inspired them to reach goals that they never had, and they did the same for me.

Out of no where, (and this literally came out of left field), I felt inspired to start new hobbies. When I was teaching, I started to get involved in a plethora of activities and hobbies. I taught myself how to knit, create jewelry out of recycled materials, and paint. I also started doing photography and even created my very own blog. I started to exercise (well, Jazzercise) —–and I hate exercising! I felt so content with my life and extremely happy, that I felt inspired to try new hobbies and to learn new things.

For some strange reason, all of that inspiration has vanished and I wish it would return. For a person like myself, with ADD, to learn all of these new hobbies was groundbreaking. Unfortunately, as we all may know, not all good things can last forever.

After losing my teaching job, I have not even felt an ounce of inspiration to do much of anything, and I know many people are becoming frustrated with me. I have not even attempted to search for a new teaching job, and my resume remains outdated in a file in my computer as we speak. I feel that it will stay that way for a while. Why wouldn’t I want these feelings of contenment, inspiration and happiness to return? Beats me.

Is it because I feel like I failed miserably at something? Do I fear that I will fail again? How can a job suck the life and inspiration out of you. This summer, I have not knitted, created jewelry,looked for a job, taken photos, or anything of the sort. I have not written on my blog in months! You guys are my witnesses! Even my husband does not understand, and finds my behavior baffling. He says “Jess, your life is not bad. I know what you are capable of.”And the crazy thing is…. I know that he is right!

I just have this feeling deep down within. It is not a sad feeling, but just an uninspired feeling. A feeling that my inspiration is gone and will never return. I want that feeling to come back so that I can start doing all of those things that I loved doing. Has anyone felt this way before? Can you relate?

The English Teacher in Me

Ok.. to those who just read my post “Some people call me crazy,” I saw a lot of mistakes in the post. Since I am a teacher, I always read and edit my posts after I publish them. So hopefully you can reread it and see that I am not that stupid… lol. Well, I will be sure to edit my posts before I publish them!!! I am sure there are other teachers who proofread their posts too. Well, I realized I need to stop typing so fast to avoid the mistakes. I am sure there are other mistakes. LOL. Hopefully, you can reread it so it makes more sense now.

Some People Call me Crazy

Throughout my life, I have been called crazy, nuts, and a head case–not only once, but multiple times. I have been told that I am “not all there” and  am “off my rocker.” I used to be very offended by those statements, however, presently I do not take the comments personally. I actually consider them to be compliments and I feel sorry for those people who do not understand mental illnesses or disabilities.

Throughout my entire life, especially during my teenage years, I knew that something  was not right and  I just could not put my finger on it. I struggled with depression, bulimia, anxiety and anger. I just thought it was a normal stage to go through in one’s life or that all teens experienced it. When I was 18 years old, I got so depressed to the point where I was desperate to escape the pain that I was feeling. I know that this may sound completely nuts, but sometimes the pain would be unbelievably unbearable that it seemed to be the easy way out.

As an adult, I would never even consider doing that and it has never once been a thought that has crossed my mind.When I was admitted into a hosital at 18, for a program for teens who struggle with depression, I can definitely say that I  learned a lot there. It was definitely a learning experience that I will never forget.

What contributed to my road to recovery was getting to know the other kids that were there and listening to their stories. I realized that I was sane, and that I was not the only one who was going through this difficult time. I also realized that my situation was not as bad as the other kids’ situations. Although some of the kids had better home lives than I did;their depression was worse because some of them would cut themselves. .

This experience made me realize that certain events that I had experienced in my life triggered my depression. I could not deal with the fact that I was adopted, that my parents got divorced, my mom’s death, and the neglect and abuse that I had to deal with from my adoptive mother. I also had to experience being kicked out of my father’s house after my mom died. I look back and see everything that I went through and am very proud of the obstacles that I had overcome and the accomplishments that I acheived on my own without the help of any parents. Many people doubted me, but I wanted to prove them wrong.

I ended up proving those wrong who doubted me by putting myself through college, graduated Magna Cum Laude, paid for my own apartment, worked my butt off and saved $30,000 dollars from waitressing ( I became obsessed with work, especially since I have ADD). I was sick of feeling sorry for myself, worked hard to fight my depression, and kept a positive attitude that life is worth living and that I will be successful one day. I even paid for my wedding, got married and bought a house at 25 years old.

One important lesson that I learned throughout all of this is that if you want something bad enough you can achieve anything. All that you have to do is  set your mind to it. I did exactly just that and became a certified Special Education English Teacher, got a job at a high school, and held the job for three years. I was able to help many of my students who were going through the same experiences that I was going through as a teen. I even saved some of my students’ lives.

Although my job unfortunately ended in the way that I did not want it to, I will never let that get the best of me. It only makes me want to work harder towards my new goals. This is because I know that I can do anything despite my disability and mental illness. I am thankful for having the opportunity to help so many of my students’ realize their strengths and that their life is worth living.

This takes a lot of courage for me to write about this online for all of the world to see, and you can think I am crazy if you want..lol…However, if there is someone out there who reads this and it helps them realize that they are not the only one who experiences this, then I will know that I have helped someone. I get very disappointed in those people who associate mental illness with being crazy or a disability with stupidity. What makes me even angrier is when people say to me, “you graduated college, there is no way in the world that you have ADD.” OR “That is just an excuse for not being organized and your inability to complete tasks.” Well, as far as I am concerned that is complete bullshit. I would do anything to be “normal” (whatever that is!). No one chooses to have a mental illness or disability, and I am not ashamed of it.

When I met my husband, that is when my life started to get better and I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. He has always been supportive and has always believed in me. He has accepted me for who I am and says that he loves me “craziness and all.” In my early twenties, I refused to go to counseling or take medication, this is because I was in denial that I had bipolar and ADD.

During my first year of teaching at the age of 25, my ADD and bipolar took the best of me since my workload increased. You see, being a first year teacher is difficult in itself, now throw on having ADD and bipolar! Talk about total chaos. The workload caused me to have bad anxiety, which led me to becoming depressed. On top of that, I dealt with criticism from my coworkers because I was “always on the go” and spoke very fast. I hated the fact that they would always tell me to “Calm down,” and asked “are you ok?”I just wanted to scream “I am fine damn it! And I do not want to f*&*Ng repeat myself!”

I would consistently be gossipped about and received dirty looks. When our budget did not pass during my first year, I feared losing my job. I even heard that teachers were saying that I should get fired because I am unorganized. I thought “wow, that’s low. They should get fired for being complete As#$*&#@.”  Thankfully getting fired did not occur and it was my breaking point. I would not let my coworkers’ get the best of me because they do not understand mental illnesses and disabilities. I truly felt sorry for them because they never EVER tried to get to know me as a person. I thought to myself, “How the hell can they be in the education field when they do not understand differences?”

With the daily stress that I encountered as a Special Ed. Teacher and my own struggles, I needed someone to speak to. I used to speak to the school psychologist for advice when I was dealing with anxiety and depression. He would always be there waiting to listen with a box of tissues. He was the one who said “Jess, do not take this offensively because you are a hard worker and outstanding teacher, but were you ever diagnosed with ADD?” I told him that I was not but informed him of my depression, anxiety and struggles throughout my schooling. He said “intelligent and creative people such as yourself, struggle with these symptoms as well” He then suggested that I speak to a psychologist outside of school for a diagnosis.

At first, I was offended and thought to myself “who is this guy to tell me that I should get a psychological evaluation?” “What does he think I am, crazy?” That night I put a lot of thought into it and realized that I was in denial and that he was only trying to help me. I knew that he was always there to support me and helped me to believe in myself. It was the first time in my life that I chose to seek help. At 25 years old, I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder, ADD, and Bipolar I disorder (manic depressive).

I then was put on an antidepressant and ADD medication. I have never EVER believed in medication, but let me tell you, it has changed my life. I can achieve more throughout my day. I do not care what other people think of me, and I worry less. My mind was always consumed with thoughts of worry, suspicion, hopelessness and anxiety.I always told myself that people were out to get me and that they did not like me. On the medication, I started to take better care of myself, became much more confident, and my depression and anxiety went away. I even stopped crying at the drop of a hat.

Medicine has changed my life completely and it has  helped me to feel “normal.” For once in my life, I  can actually say that I love my life and look forward to the next day.  It truly has changed my life and solidified that I do have a mental illness and disability. Although the medicine does not change my rapid speech, inability to be organized, and arriving to places on time, I would take that over anxiety and depression anyday.

I am extremely thankful for the day that the school psychologist gave me that advice and for my husband for dealing with my angry outbursts and the days where I went “Crazy” and cursed at him and punched walls and threw things. Not at him of course. LOL. I know…. pretty nuts right? He is a gem among gems and I can never thank god enough for having this amazing man enter my life. For the past 9 years he has supported me and is the most loyal person I know. I hope that if there is anyone out there who is reading this that does not understand ADD and mental illness, I hope this gives you some insight and a better understanding. I also hope that some readers find that they can relate to this, and  that it helps those think twice before calling anyone crazy.

Well, this took a lot for me to share, but if I can help one person out there, then it is worth it and I have achieved my goal. Thank you to those who took the time to read this post. It means a lot to me.

OH, and by the way… You are not crazy! lol

~ Jess ~

Free Stuff!

Since I lost my job, I have been looking for different ways to save money. I was recently at Walmart when I came across an issue of Consumer Reports and on the cover it read “Free Stuff” and so I just had to have it. Now, if you are currently unemployed, a stay at home mom or a single mother or father, I am sure you will benefit from the sites that I am about to share with you. I know many of the freebies are mainly samples, but the products are regular sized, so that is a bonus in itself. I know many of us are hesitant to sign up for anything out of fear that our information will be placed on the internet. However, the magazine suggests that you make up a separate email address. The only thing is, you have to give your home address so that the free stuff can be sent to you. Consumer Reports also did the research and weeded out the scams from the legit sites. I have had luck with getting free stuff. I received free perfume, shampoo, deodorant, laundry detergent, dishwasher detergent, make up, coupons for free food, etc. They have so many things that you can choose from, so if you are interested, here are the sites. Enjoy!

~Jess

http://www.heyitsfree.net
http://www.freebirthdaymeals.org
http://www.hunt4freebies.com
http://www.moneysaving mom.com
http://www.freeflys.com
http://www.freebies4mom.com
http://www.freebieshark.com
http://www.sweetfreestuff.com
http://www.womanfreebies.com
http://www.vocalpoint.com
http://www.pgeveryday.com

LEt me know if you get anything ! Good luck!

Any ideas for working online?

 

I have been interested in working online. Does anyone on here know of any paid online jobs? Since I am a certified English teacher, I was looking into online teaching/tutoring. I would also like to sell my homemade jewelry online too. If anyone has any or knows of any online jobs, please let me know. Or even if you know of any good sites for selling handmade jewelry/ crafts. Sometimes it is difficult to weed out the scams vs. legit sites.

I am interested in online jobs for : tutoring, teaching, writing, selling crafts or blogging

I am kinda desperate for work since I just lost my job! My ideal situation would be to work online so that I can start a family.

I hope some of you bloggers have some suggestions! Anything would be greatly appreciated!

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